another reflection on life...

dad's friend's wife kena cancer.. she went through treatment and was thought to have recovered but unfortunately, they found that the cancer spread.. this time.. if i'm not wrong, it kena the brain... from months, to weeks.. now she only has days to live.. it's v sad.. i overheard dad saying that his friend usually turn off the phone at night.. but ever since the wife was admitted, his phone is on 24/7.. in case the hospital calls up.. :( i'm not close to the family.. but hearing things like that just make me sad.. then i see people around me, taking others for granted.. it's just so............... *shakes head*

i mean, i can dun bother about others, but i dunno why it just gets to me.. is it the life here? or just the people around me? or is the entire world like that? i dun expect one to be 100% grateful to everything and everyone.. i believe a normal human being is unable to achieve that.. people get angry, frustrated, irritated over matters.. i just need to learn to 看开一点...

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i dread going to work tmr.. to think i thought i will here for life.. something has to change.. i hope my boss change for the better.. be it a change in character or change in person..

i hope G can be less bossy.. i "willingly" helped her and now i'm in her project.. sometimes she tries to help me.. but at times, she is crossing the line.. it's as if i'm useless and she doesn't take what i say seriously.. i need to be more patient with her.. (RECALL: one of my 2011 resolution - maintain my calm when dealing with irritating people!!)

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before i started work, my parents used to bring me travelling.. i dun expect that as a norm neither do i take it for granted.. sometimes when i just wanna share my travel experience with my colleagues, i think twice.. just the other day, a colleague of mine told me she's going korea with her daughter.. so i shared a bit about this place of interest there.. then she and another colleague started commenting how lucky i was.. said that they hardly have a chance to travel when they were young.. (their parents don't bring them travelling).. one even said whenever she had to travel, it was being forced (family issues).. so anyway, it made me feel that i said something wrong.. i felt so awkward, i just shut up later.. sometimes, i feel that i can't say anything.. they can share their experiences but once i start to say mine, nobody is interested to listen.. it becomes kind of a one-way communication.. i mean, i'm quite happy with who they are but at times, i really feel like they dun treat me seriously..

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last year was the most miserable year in my life.. this year has been good so far.. but pple around me.. i see them experiencing unhappiness.. which is kinda sad cos it indirectly affects me..

i'm feeling miserable now..